In which there was a learning experience.

So I meant to do this post before today but I’m only now sitting down to actually do it.  I blame the fact that the entire thing was not my favorite event in the whole world but you can go ahead and probably put it up to procrastination more than anything else.

I went out on Saturday with a few people and I can’t decide if it was a good experience or a bad one.  I will say that it has taught me something that I should have already known about myself but I’m still not sure on too much else.

Wait no, that’s a lie.  I know I like to get flogged.  I like it a lot.

What I don’t seem to like though, is the traditional intimacies that couples share.  Now, I am aware that I am not the most touchy person in the world.  Morgan can clearly attest to the fact that I am not a cuddly puppy, more like an awkward porcupine who occasionally wants to be squeezed. 

This guy?  Did not know that about me. 

This guy did not know this about me and was very insistent that he call me pretty and hold me by the wast and stroke my face and kiss me gently.

Guys?  That is not really what I’m into, I have to admit it.  I  If Morgan tried to pull that, it would be one thing but when a stranger is doing it?  No, it’s not charming, it’s not sweet it makes me feel gross and dirty and caused me to nearly have a breakdown when I got home that night.

But I did say I got some good things out of this experience, right?  Because I did.

I learned about the flogging for one and I found that a few of the mate’s traits have carried over.  I’m a big fan of getting bitten and scratched.  That was fun.  If he could have kept teasing me like that all night long, we would have been golden, it was just the other stuff that got to me.

This weekend is a munch and a play party.  I’m going to hopefully be going to both but I’ll certainly be going to the munch.  I’m looking forward to it, as I’d like this last experience to be done and over with and I don’t’ think I’ll really have that feeling until I’ve gone and done something else. 

Moral of the story?  Charley and physical affection do not get along.  Stay tuned for next week when we explore the do’s and don’ts of social interaction.  As always, if you have any questions or comments you can email me at abitaskewed@gmail.com

To everyone out there, I wish you kind fires, a warm bed and, most importantly, someone (or someones) to share it with.

         

The post where Charley shows that she can't get up early, Portal meetings, vibrators and plans for next weekend

Let me paint a picture for you.  It's Saturday morning, the sun is streaming through the window blinds, the birds are singing and my cat is padding around the room.  I'm just starting to wake up and I look around, thinking to myself that yes, today is going to be a very good day.

My mother walks in, she's smiling and I wearily ask her, just out of curiosity, what time it is.  In my mind, I'm thinking it must be some time before noon if not even earlier.

Holy fuck was I wrong.

Turns out I woke up at 1:15 today and the Portal meeting (a BDSM educational group) was at 1.  Guess who wend into panic mode?

I jumped out of bed, hopped in the shower, threw some clothes on and dragged my mother out of the house, all the while thinking that I may as well just not bother going.  It was too late anyway and I hate, hate, <i>hate</i> being late for anything, especially when I'm new to whatever it is I'm going to.

Well kids, I went and I'm glad I did.

The meeting itself was a show and tell.  I got to see some very nice floggers, a few very pretty knives and all manner of pervertables, mostly stuff you could pick up at hardware stores and flea markets, actually. 

I swear, BDSM was made for crafters and anyone who works at a hardware store.  The more I poke around the scene, the more assured I become of this fact.

There was some socializing and I got to know a few people.  One woman, we'll call her Kerry, was even nice enough to give me a ride home and, as it turns out, lives within walking distance of my house.  She was extremely friendly and willing to talk to me and has decided that I need more sex in my life.

I did not object to this conclusion.

The other event that I thought was today is actually next weekend.  I'm going to talk to Kerry and see if she'll be willing to give me a ride there.  I don't know if she will but it's worth a shot and it's more exposure.

Because that's my main goal right now, getting out there and seeing what's around the area.  So far, I have to say it's worked out fairly well. 

I really enjoyed the atmosphere of Portal, everyone was open, sociable and even willing to talk to me (the person curled in the corner of a couch watching curiously).  They were informative with their demonstrations, open to ideas that members posed and generally seemed like a group that wants to cater to the education and enjoyment of BDSM.

So, in short?  I'm definitely going back and think that, if you even have a slight interest in the scene, you should join me.

Something that was brought up during the meeting that also kind of made me smile was their promotion of local toy makers.  They're all for supporting the local scene and while this makes perfect sense, it's really nice to see it in action.  A lot of the local makers here seem to be willing to work with you, repair anything that gets worn down or broken and generally try and help you with what you need.  Basically, their customer service skills kick some serious ass.

Next time, I'm going I'm going to actually make it a point to get a list of people so I can put them up here for reference.  I don't expect to be going off and purchasing anything any time soon but you never know.  If nothing else, Christmas is around the corner and I have yet to make my wishlist.

Speaking of toys, I have started the search for a vibrator.  I've never owned one before and I think, considering I've started this, it's about time that changed.  I've been looking around and am probably going to go with a low priced bullet style at least for now.  Since I'm new to all this, I don't really see the point of spending money I don't have on something that I'm not going to be very good with at first. 

I have been considering the rabbit style as well but I'm not so sure.  I think it's really going to come down to what really catches my eye and what's the best deal I can get.  If I have magically gotten people to read this and any of you have any suggestions, please leave them in the comments, as they'd be a great help.

I'm also investing in a package of condoms when I place my order, wherever it is I wind up buying it because I don't have any and, if I plan to actually, you know, have sex, I'm doing it safely, damnit.

Whatever vibrator I end up getting, there will be a review, though like I said, brand new owner and all that so you'd best take my advice with a grain of salt.  Still, I figure if I can help get some information out there, why the hell not?

Oh, I forgot to mention but I also may be going to the LGBTQ meeting next weekend.  I'm not sure yet, as it's across the bridge and that's a bit tricky for me to get to but I'm going to try.  If it turns out I can actually manage to go, next weekend is going to be a very busy one but definitely fun.  We'll just have to wait and see, I guess.

Anyway, I've gone on enough for the night.  As always, if you have any questions or comments you can email me at abitaskewed@gmail.com

To everyone out there, I wish you kind fires, a warm bed and, most importantly, someone (or someones) to share it with.

Let's get this rolling, shall we?

    So, you're probably wondering why on Earth you'd want to bother to waste your time with another sex blog.  I know there are plenty out there and, to be perfectly honest, I don't follow most of them.  It's not because I have anything against them, but it's more that, until a few months ago, my personal interest in sex was... well, not exactly the norm.

    Let's start off with introductions, shall we?

    I'm Charlotte, Charley for short, and no, it's not my real name.  I'm being anonymous because it's what I'm comfortable with.  Perhaps in the future there will be a 'reveal', but considering the nature of the blog, I feel that discretion on the who's who front is advised.  For the few of you who do actually know me, I ask that you respect my wishes and please keep my identity, and that of anyone who may be involved, to yourself.

    ....That wasn't much of an introduction, was it?  Much more of a disclaimer, I'd say.  Let's try that again.

    I'm twenty, living in Tampa, and identify as a gender fluid pansexual.  I'm currently in a polyamorous relationship with another gender fluid pansexual and we are very happy with each other, despite many things that have fallen into our path.

    Why this blog is here is a somewhat amusing story.  I have this tendency to want to start projects, all kinds of projects.  I'm in the process of learning how to knit, teaching myself how to play the ukulele, writing a novel, and running another blog.  This isn't including the plans I have of starting my own business and going back to school.

    The point here?  I like projects.

    So, what started out as mere frustration at the local bookstore's section on sex (mainly that I found it to be completely useless, save for one or two books, and this was especially true of those that had pictures) somehow blew up in my brain and became far too involved to be contained in just a book.  Because yes, initially I was going to try and write the kind of sex book that I would want to read.

    So, that brings us to where we are now.  Brand spanking new blog, bright eyed and bushy tailed blogger, and hopes for the future.

    What I'm hoping for is an informative, open-minded and safe space for people to talk about sexuality as well as be able to get helpful information, fun ideas, and maybe even recommendations on things here and there.

    The other part of this blog is going to be a kind of travel log.  See, I'm not actually that experienced in sex.  I has sex with a woman once when I was fourteen and that's it.  That's all.  My relationship with sex has been as a curious onlooker but nothing more.  Now that I'm twenty, about to be living on my own, in a relationship, and more willing to take risks and explore, I've decided to take it upon myself to start seeing just what's out there in the big wide world of sexuality.

    So, what that means is also going to be a bit like a sexual diary.  A place where I write down my thoughts and experiences, ideas and anything else that falls under the topic.  This will probably go beyond sex and into gender and the various lifestyles I choose to explore.  Right now I'm very interested in BDSM and have attended one munch and one fetish night at a club.  I'm going to actually be attending an educational meeting tomorrow and considering going to the fetish night at another club tomorrow evening.  I'm starting to make friends who are already in the scene and have been talking to someone who may be willing to act as a mentor/teacher for me.  All of these things will be discussed and I hope that you will be willing to share your experiences as well.

    And I think that's probably enough talking for me.  Hopefully I've given you a basic rundown of who I am, what you can find here, and all the other fun stuff you can expect to get out of me in the future.  If you have any questions or comments, you should feel free to email me at abitaskewed@gmail.com.

    To all of you out there who managed to stick through this entire into, I wish you kind fires, a warm bed, and, most importantly, someone (or someones) to share it with.